Treatment of the last chance of cancer with metastases
Ends on: 11 October 2017
Ciężko jest pisać takie zakończenia, zwłaszcza kiedy ciągle myśli się przez pryzmat walki. Agnieszka miała tylko 40 lat – za mało. Kiedy rozpoczęła walkę na śmierć i życie, wszyscy wstrzymaliśmy oddech. Kiedy my wracaliśmy do domów z pracy, Agnieszka walczyła o swoje życie, starała się wydrzeć z objęć raka. Agnieszka mówiła, że boi się dnia, w którym nikt już nie będzie chciał o nią walczyć. Takiego dnia nie było – dzięki Wam mogła walczyć do końca, mogła wierzyć w to, że w końcu uda się wygrać.
Dzisiaj zadzwonił telefon, Aga zmarła w sobotę. Nie udało się pokonać potwornej choroby. Dzięki Wam stało się wiele dobrego. Umarła nie straciwszy nadziei. Leczenie dawało jej wielką szansę. Pozostali jej rodzice, siostra, ukochani siostrzeńcy. Oni Kochali Ją najbardziej.
Dziękujemy, że byłaś z nami i że byłaś taka dzielna.
Rodzinie składamy najszczersze wyrazy współczucia.
What life am I dreaming? Does not matter what, I just want to live, like every human, who dies of cancer, I just want only one - I want any miracle to survive. I was always afraid of the injections, and now I'm dreaming, to be pricked, to accept so much of these drugs, because this is only one way for me to survive, just one way to see how it will be in a year, two ... Nobody wants to die, because life is beautiful and precious. Everyone has got only one life, and my every day fades away. I'm afraid of day, when a doctor will say the words, after which I will not have anything else, any hope – “we did everything, we lost ...”
When I was 35 years old, I dreamed of prosaic things, I wanted to take rest on the weekend, to go for holidays, to be loved, to start a family. Instead of family, I put on a hard woman's mask, though in the middle I have been out of power for a few years. What was I thinking, when my body tried to let me know we had a problem? Tired, with enlarged nodes, strange nodules in the groin, I went to work, because it probably was a cold, worse period. How many of you would have done this? Though having 35 years old, no one thinks about getting sick, nay, no one thinks about today, but plans tomorrow, the future. I think, I did not look so carefully,, because when came this day, that my future got uncertain of tomorrow, nothing reached me, I still understood nothing.
I was sitting in the doctor's room, who just told me I had a malignant cancer and I looked at him as he had said something in a foreign language. Year 2012, me - 35 years old, I’ve heard first time I have cancer. I have never been a type of warrior, always withdrawn, mentally weak, I had to fight with something, that killed millions of people. “You are so young - said the doctor, we have to operate, but it will be a saver, I mean ovary, and you can still be a mother, whole future is before you.” The cancer took me the motherhood first. During the operation, it was decided that nobody would ever say "mom" to me. Cancer changes were too much, they cuted everything ...
8 cycles of chemotherapy , which I cried few of them. The poison has poisoned the cancer and poisoned me, the hours I spent looking at those drops, small droplets, that like soldiers were fighting for me, a thin hose ran down and disappeared in my body. It was bad, weak, growing tiredness and nausea, after which only sleep brought relief. My friends raised children, I fought for life, my friends wrote text messages from their normal world, to my little, silent oncological hell, where everyone was left alone in the end.
My hair has fallen, but the woman should have hair, for herself, for her consciousness, for wanting to stay a woman, deadly sick, but still woman. There were only earrings. The first thing I saw in the mirror, was that I am still a woman, worn out, bald, with dark circles under eyes, but still the same Agnieszka.
Remission - the word in the world of oncology is like a great promise, and although doctors do not make treat it like promise, every cancer sufferer, after hearing that word, feels like a winner. And although this fight I went almost on all fours, I was glad that I live, that I can now fix all mistakes. Traumatized by the disease, I finally showed her, who ruled, that even such a weak person like me, can find the strength to overcome the cruelest of diseases. They began to grow hair, a fantastic feeling when you wake up in the morning, you touch your head and feel them under your fingers. This rebirth is like spring for the body, you start to feel the taste, you do not sleep all the time, you can finally eat. A beautiful time, when great gratitude mix with euphoria. Finally, after few months, you believe that you will live, that you will be able to do everything, what is bad - left behind.
4 years of caution have passed, 4 beautiful years of hope, holidays, time spent with my beloved nephew. Last year after the test, I found out that I had to die again, that it was only a dream, I did not win, and I lost more than I thought. On the PET test is already lit everything, metastasis to the liver, the stomach was also attacked. I was sure that now I can hear what I was afraid so many years – Dear Agnieszka, we did everything. It is very hard, because someone who has gone through all like me, I do not believe in miracles anymore, but doctors have convinced me, that there is one more chance.
The last fight with cancer, what will decide everything, can take place in a clinic, the doctors want to take up again the fight of my life. I have only one life, like everyone of us, so I do not want to give up. Modern treatment methods aiming straight into cancer is the my last chance. For standard treatment I just have no health or strength anymore. I want to try to survive, that’s why I ask You for support, without it my only chance will disappear.
The therapy that I have to use to save my life is extremely expensive. The half-yearly cost of treatment is over 130,000 PLN (Polish Zloty). Treatment, that is my hope, for me is financially impossible. I beg for your help! I beg you, help me fight for life. Without your help, without your heart, I will not be able to take the chance to fight the metastasis, with the chance of returning to the desired health, the chance to survive. Next year my nephew will join Holy Communion. I would love to be there. Agnieszka