To stop death and pain

Imagine pain so strong you forget your name. Pain unstoppable by any painkiller is leading to handicaps and death. Imagine you can’t rememeber the last night you slept fully and days you passes out by the pain you cannot handle. Syringomyelia is a diagnosis I’ve been living with for more than 10 years with. The only chance to release myself from that is and operation. There is not much time left…

My nam is Leokadia. How long I can hold this on? How much time I have? Syringomyelia is disease which attacked my spinal cord. Disease of sensory disorder by which I can’t feel the differenct between cold and hot. Disease which can switch the victims into plants in human body, as some day lungs and food system can stop working.  

I‘ve been living in pain since serious accident at my wok place. That time I worked for the in a car area where heavy vehicles were driven all over illegally placed gas pipe. One day I lighted up a match while gas was escaping via scratch in pipe. I stand in a firre immediately. I woke in hospital with burned all body parts that were not cover by clothes: face, hands, neck, legs. Since that time I live in pain.  My face, hands. Legs were in tragic shape. It’s hard to come back to that time for me.I went through couple of operations, skin transplantations 2 year of rehabilitation…

What happend to me definitly changed my life approach. Life is more delicate, more fragile and fleeting. After all excercises and rehabilitation I decided to get pregnant. Everything was perfect till 5th month when I got stroke. I was suggested to abort pregnancy as it was a life risk for me. I couldn’t imagine to lose a child, I said no. After stroke I was left with extravasation. I was feeded with painkiller by doctors but sometimes I wanted to finisz all that as I could not get up from bed due the pain. …

There is a high possibility, that all of that leaded to show up of Syringomyelia – sickness which will slowly kill me if I will not go through another operation. First it will stop me to move hands, then I will not be able to walk. Finilly I will pass out…

Noone in Poland can treat Syringomyelia. There is just one clinic all over the world - Institut Chiari & Syringomyelia & Skolioza in Barcelona – which has a possibility to help me by cutting filum terminale. They helped a lot of people who could only count on helpful hand from others kind people.. This clinic is my last chance to stay alive. 

I beat burn and stroke, but I can’t handle pain. Today I fight not only for myself. I fight for my daughter too, who has breast cancer. I know, she needs me and I need to live to be with her. My sickness can be healed but I haven’t such money to pay for exertion. I wish to see how my grandchildren are growing up, and I don’t want to be just to be a burden. I wish to help my child beat the cancer. I wish to live and enjoy the life without pain.

I strongly believe it’s not my time. I believe I deserve  a chance to live!. Help me, Please. Without you I can’t win…