Although I’ve just turned 20, I sometimes feel like an old lady. Dreadful pain is part of my life. I’ve almost forgot, how it feels, to not be in pain...
Many of you will ask themselves, what does this adult girl want from me? Why should I help her, when there’s so many little creatures waiting for help. Well, each person, that comes here, needs help to live, because every other options have failed. And so do I...
Youth should be the time of carefreeness, meanwhile I’m struggling with problems, that young lady should have not face. I cannot seat and lie down for a long time, I can’t have any exercise, swim in because of terrible pain. Sometimes I just can’t stop my tears - they’re pressing themselves into my eyes from powerlessness. I was born with hip dysplasia and dislocation as well as with muscle limpness of whole body. I associate my childhood with continuous rehabilitation, sometimes even painful. In hindsight, I know if I weren’t done regular exercises and rehabilitation, I would feel much worse. I still have to rehabilitate myself to be able to go to class or sleep the night without pain....I try to smile in spite of the pain, but sometimes I fall off my feet.
I have to go through surgery to repair the damage in the Labrum acetabulare that will allow me to live normally. Unfortunately, I have to pay for it myself - it is not refunded by the NFZ. I'm just starting university, starting my adult life. . . I'm studying physiotherapy because I want to help people like me. My parents can't afford to help me either, although they'd love to. When they see how I cannot lie, stand, or sit, because pain takes away the joy of life, they dream - just like me - of only one thing. So that I can finally move around and forget about the pain. I believe the good comes back and I will be able to help many people when I graduate. All I can promise you now, is that I won't waste the chance I've been given. . . that I will do everything I can to help people suffering as I do, to regain their fitness and the knowledge I gain. I want to take their pain away and give them a chance. But first I have to stop suffering myself. . .
Finally, let me quote here a poem that gives me strength and faith for the better tomorrow:
When you are born, the path of life is empty, and every failure hell-burns in your mouth.
And time passes, the world clock ticks, sometimes happiness escapes your hand. No signposts, constant change of images, hotter and hotter blood in your veins is flowing. . .
Don't wait for your time to pass, after every fall get up stronger. . . Never give up before time!
Mark the days with your hands, no matter how fate bothers you. There is so much more to get, don't be afraid of your own reflection, don't be afraid of your dreams, just what, good, always remember.
After every fall, get up stronger, never give up before time. . .
The operation is my only chance. I ask you, if you can, to be one of the angels that will make me finally start living!